Typically I would send out my recap on Tuesday mornings, but due to the fact that somebody forced me to drink somewhere between 4 and 13 beers on Monday in observance of Labor Day, you guys are just getting the one this week. Luckily the Week 2 College Football slate is buns, so this shouldn’t be too long, so let’s get to it shall we?
What did we learn? Quite a bit, and at the same time nothing at all, because it’s a 4 month long season and we’re just getting started.
The BIG NEWS:
1. Arch Manning, are you okay bud? All that Manning blood flowing through his veins, and he goes out and drops an absolute stinker against Ohio State. Now, that OSU defense is likely one of if not the best unit in all of CFB, so I am not selling any Arch Manning stock just yet, in fact I’m buying the dip. This was the young mans first REAL start and road game, and it just so happened to be against the defending National Champs. On the flip side, to play couch quarterback for a second, that brother was missing throws Uncle Rico could’ve hit. Simple crossing routes and check downs became difficult, and every defensive shell OSU showed and switched out of confused the hell out of him. He has a lot of room to improve and grow, and Sark has to be more trusting in his young QB moving forward. If you take a step back and realize that the Buckeyes have a former NFL head coach as their defensive coordinator, his struggles make a bit more sense. Matt Patricia schemed up a perfect game, utilizing all the talent at his disposal to make Arch’s life a living hell for 60 minutes. OSU is back on top of CFB until further notice, and Texas has some soul searching to do. Maybe Arch can see if the Manning Passing academy does any regular season charity work.
2. Alabama lost, and the world rejoices. The Tide ebbed and flowed all the way down to #21 in this week’s AP Poll. Did I pick them to win? That’s not important, because I’ve never been happier to be wrong. FSU didn’t just win, they BULLIED the Tide on the line of scrimmage on both sides of the ball. Bama has the athletes, but it looked like they’d rather be off filming Tik Toks rather than hustling to the football and gang tackling with the ferocity of a pack of hungry lions. FSU on the other hand, has found their fire via transfer QB Thomas Castellanos’ and his inspiring pregame words that rang true – Nick Saban was not there to save them. Was this a fluke? Is Alabama finally mediocre? Is FSU the favorite to win the ACC? No clue, but it sure was damn fun watching those jackasses lose.
3. Tigers roll into Clemson and win the battle of Death Valley. Speaking of being wrong, hand up here, I was expecting more from my preseason National Champ. Clemson’s performance was a bit underwhelming. The defense actually played pretty well all things considered, I think that LSU receiving core and offense will be putting up 30+ points per game moving forward, and the Clemson defense was able to disrupt Nussmeier and keep them in the game. Klubnik struggled against a surprisingly aggressive and persistent LSU defense. My advanced algorithm did not calculate them being so impressive defensively, and my sweet prince Cade Klubnik struggled. I think Clemson will find their footing again and bounce back, so I’m doubling down on them. As for the victorious Tigers, be wary SEC. This teams resembles the LSU of old – explosive offense, experienced big armed QB, aggressive defense, and of course an alcoholic ill-tempered Head Coach who has killed at least one person.
4. Notre Dame isn’t quite back just yet, but Carson Beck might be. The Irish went down to Miami and played a pretty shite game offensively, until late in the second half where they started to cover some ground. Granted, they had freshman QB CJ Carr make his first career start, and after a bit of struggle, he finally showed the flashes ND fans were waiting on. Unfortunately those flashes came a little too late in the game, as the Canes had a double digit lead by then. Carson Beck looked good, but I’m not ready to forget about his rich history of dumbassery just yet. He was bailed out from a horrible pass by one of the best catches I have seen in a long time, but showed his experience and poise to get the Canes out of some tough spots and move the ball. Miami has officially entered the conversation for ACC frontrunner, but has a difficult stretch of games coming up that could expose or solidify that position. For the Irish, you have a week to regroup, then you host Texas A&M, so buckle up.
OTHER News:
– Is it just me or does Tennessee kinda sorta look good? Maybe it’s because they played a defense that ranked outside of the Top 100 last year. Anyway, Vols roll to 1-0.
– Indiana is somehow ranked, they stink and I will stand by that take. They barely beat Old Dominion.
– Penn State, Oregon, Iowa State, Oklahoma, Florida, Texas Tech, Georgia and SMU all win handedly against some variation of Sister Mary’s School of the Blind and Deaf, remain ranked.
– LaNorris Sellers and South Carolina take down Virginia Tech in one of the most entertaining games of the Week 1 slate.
Not gonna lie here fellas, keeping this real TIGHT this week because we don’t have many good ones. So, what I did for you guys was borrow the nice graphic below outlining some of the best games.
My initial thoughts on some of these games:
– Oklahoma -5.5: I’m all in on the John Mather hype. I think Michigan is a good team with a solid squad, but I expect Oklahoma QB John Mateer to put up some numbers on the ground and through the air. He’s dynamic and this Sooner team needs to make a statement after the up and down season last year.
– South Florida +18.5: You guys know I love the Bulls, and I’m gonna continue to tell the people about Byrum Brown until they listen. This team is scrappy, and has a chip on their shoulder headed to the Swamp. DJ Lagway and the Gators have a really tough schedule ahead of them, and I think this is a potential look ahead spot for them where the Bulls can make this sneaky close.
– Baylor +3.5: I promise this isn’t a spite pick, but the Bears will bounce back against SMU. Sawyer Robertson played really poorly, and the defense got embarrassed last week. Dave Aranda will have these cats ready to roll. I also love the over 63.5.
– Kansas & Mizzou o51.5. Might be my favorite play and game of the weekend. I LOVE Mizzou transfer RB Ahmad Hardy and QB Beau Pribula, and Kansas QB Jalon Daniel’s is electric. I’m expecting points here, no, I NEED points here.
Ohhhhh baby, we are so back. A little appetizer and entree action last weekend to satiate our football hunger, and now we get to eat again but this time we get the hot fudge sundae with the cherry on top.
PrizePicks TD Scorers of the week are brought to you by Dude Wipes.
If there’s anyone who knows a thing or two about getting in the trenches & getting their butts in the (end) zone, it’s Dude Wipes.
Derrick Henry – Remember him? The 31 year old RB who ages like fine wine? You know, the guy who averaged a touchdown a game in one of the best rushing duos of the last two decades? Not gonna overthink this one. The King is back and finds the end zone.
Brian Robinson Jr. – Say what you want about him, but when he is healthy he finds the end zone. Sidelined by injury for most of last season, he’s eager to get back out there and the 49ers will feed him (per sources, I talked to them) – please note this write up was specifically created and crafted for Christian McCaffrey and I had to update it due to him being made of glass
Jamarr Chase – taking all the chalky guys, but I don’t care. It’s week 1, they just paid the man, he is going to score and griddy all over the endzone.
Malik Nabers – It pains me a little to take a Giants player to score a touchdown, but DangeRuss is in the big apple now slinging the rock, and I guarantee you if he doesn’t get Nabers the ball 10 times he will be benched for Jaxson Dart. Long bomb incoming.
Ashton Jeanty – I am taking the bait here, he will score. 1st round draft pick Rookie running back that is the focal point of the offense. Go ahead and mark him down.
James Connor – The Iron Man who has beaten cancer not once, but twice, heads to NOLA to face off against the worst team known to man. Big man carry the rock into the end zone.
Josh Allen – MVP of the league facing the Ravens and 2 time MVP Lamar Jackson in the first Sunday Night football game of the season, can’t you just picture the Josh Allen rushing TD?? I certainly can. I am also taking the over in this game no matter what it is. Yes yes I know that primetime games typically have a horrible history of scoring points and hitting the over, but I do not care, I cheer for POINTS and OFFENSE.
NFL Quick Picks
Chiefs vs. Chargers -3.5: Am I stupid for betting against Patrick Mahomes? Probably but I don’t care, LA is full of Exciting Whites like Ladd McConkey, Justin Herbert, Cameron Dicker, etc. This game is also in São Paolo, Brazil, which is known for its horrific field conditions and surplus of coffee, so how will that effect the recently engaged Travis Kelce? Murmurs on the street are suggesting he was focused on the wrong ring all season last year, and his new $1.6 Billion fiancé might pull his attention even further this year. Gimme the exciting whites to come back to the states 1-0.
Panthers @ Jaguars -2.5: Bryce Young this, Tet McMillan that, I do not care, the Panthers are ASS. The Jags have a new Head Coach Liam Coen, drafted Heisman trophy winner Travis Hunter to play both sides, and Trevor Lawrence and Bryan Thomas Jr. will be a fun duo to watch. I think it’s a bigger game for Liam Coen than anyone else, as he has a talented roster and it’s his new squads home opener. We saw the effect he had on Baker Mayfield the last few years in Tampa, and I expect him to have the same influence on T-Law. The spread is a little low and I like the movement I’ve seen come in on the Jags, so I’m #JagginOff.
Lions @ Packers -1.5: I love Green Bay this season. I say this nearly every year but this time I mean it, they can win the Super Bowl. I know Detroit had all the hype in the world last season, having a franchise best year in wins and making it into the playoffs, but the Packers just trade raped the Cowboys last week and got Micah Parsons for a 1st round pick or two and a large bag of Flamin Hot Cheetos. I expect Jordan Love to have a huge year and adding Parsons to that already fast athletic defense is the future Hall of Fame cherry on top.
Bengals @ Browns o48.5: Loving this over. Joe Flacco and Joe Burrow, Joe vs Joe, two gunslingers, how could this game not result in 100 points? Aside from two great edge rushers (Miles Garrett and Trey Hendrickson), both of these defenses are kinda buns so I need the Joe’s to sling that pigskin like their life depends on it.
Bucs @ Falcons o47.5: BIG MIKE PENI(S)X is the new lead man in Atlanta and the buzz around this team is palpable for the first time since the 1st half of the 2017 Super Bowl. Bijan Robinson and Drake London complete the 3 headed beast that is this Falcons offensive attack, which should be fun to watch . The worry is the defense; a lot of young talent and some big time additions from the draft last year, but how will they mesh? For the Bucs it’s the same old same old. Baker finished as a top 6 QB last year in nearly all passing statistics, and despite the injury to star WR Chris Godwin, they return all offense and added 1st round WR Emeka Egbuka from OSU. They have a solid crew defensively but I think we see the ball sling around in this divisional rivalry game.
That’s all I’ve got ladies and gents, here are some meme’s for you.
Love you guys,
TWD
